What are we doing to improve our relationships?
The western world lives in a temporary society. When my toaster breaks, I throw it in the trash and buy a new one. This has changed a lot from decades ago, if something were to break then we would spend the time to fix it and make it work. The same applies to people and relationships would last longer because we would work at them, ceaselessly and just do whatever it takes to make them function. Nowadays we live in a world of instant gratification, we need to be rewarded for our efforts and who we are, instantly. We need it now. Give me the likes, the comments and how good can you make me feel about myself. Interactions become more about expectation than simply the pleasure of doing something for someone else.
I need an accolade for my selfie, for my quote or my good deed. None of this is necessarily bad but it has led to a culture of savagery emerging and from that Men and Women have realised that they deserve better.
I’m all for setting your standards high, there is a threshold for each and every person and I believe that they shouldn’t go below it. You want respect, the respect you deserve and you should have it. You want loyalty and you should have that too. You want your partner to give you the most amazing orgasm you’ve ever encountered then fuck yes, just yes.
Is distrust being passed down?
From a young age, girls are taught not to trust men. It's encoded into them, from other females around them. Men are branded as disloyal and "only after one thing." Are females projecting their fears and past experiences onto the females of the generation after them? It's like a bleeding effect that transmutes to the females around them. Women being betrayed in past relationships, not made to feel special and their needs are misunderstood. I firmly believe a partner should make you feel like a star that they plucked out of the sky and it's used to light up their entire world. That's pretty fucking special, nourishing an entire planet like the sun, kinda special.
Women would just like their partners to show a certain level of emotional intelligence and empathy. Why is their partner not making them feel special? why are they not even considering what that void in their loved one might be and how they may go about pouring themselves into it, to make their partner feel loved. Is he showing affection for me how I want him to show affection for me? affection can come in many different ways. Showing affection means caring, showing loyalty, knowing when not to give space and showing her that she's an equal. She's beside you and never behind you. To have emotional intelligence means to feel exactly what her needs are. You should be able to read your partner's energy like you would your favorite book and know exactly what word comes next in every sentence. After all, you chose her and she chose you.
We live in a world of attachment. We're attached to the attention we get and to the approval we have. There's an entire world of diversity, ready at our fingertips. We can find people to date of all shapes and sizes at the push of a few buttons. Has this made us desensitized to actually appreciating our lovers? if we're not getting the love and attention we require then we try to find it somewhere else and this has led to women not feeling like they're special anymore. Sure, women should make themselves feel special, they are Queens. That being said, what are men doing to make their Queen feel special? are they showing her the love she deserves? are men showing her the support that she needs? she has dreams and aspirations and a partner should be willing to give her the support she needs to nurture those dreams. Every dream in a creator's hands makes a universe and stars will rain down on the entire world. Men, you chose her, now show some fucking devotion to her.
Have women hardened their delicate exteriors and formed a tougher shell to protect their hearts and souls from being mistreated by partners? Modern society tells us yes. An enormous surge of female empowerment has led to women uniting with one another. Women standing alongside other women and helping each other, supporting each other and they’ve formed a network of strong women.
Is he showing symptoms of catering to female needs with empathy and romancing the life into her?
The new type of male has begun to surface in the last few years and he’s softer and a hell of a lot more emotionally intelligent. This man feels the vibration that’s pulsating out of the opposite sex and resonates with it. He wants to cherish his female counterpart, he understands that she has needs too and those needs are less primitive than he first thought. The stereotypical male archetype is being thrown out of the window and the modern man is kinder, empathetic and treats women on the level. As in, the level of respect that should’ve always been there. Is it something new? or Is it something that has resided in men for a long time.
The modern man wants to understand his female counterpart. He wants to empathize with her. Why did our interaction happen? and why was it good or bad? how can I improve my interactions with my lover? These are all questions the modern male is asking himself. Being able to understand himself has led to understanding her. He can feel what her needs are (food, loyalty, spanking, orgasms and having her dreams supported.) The modern man needs to be able to understand what she's passionate about and why she's passionate about it. Take a fucking interest in her life and listen to what she has to say. A little bit of romance goes a long way. I've never heard a woman say she didn't want to be swept off her feet, whether you've been dating for weeks or married for years. She wants to be loved like the world is about to end.
Men aren't just willing to open themselves up more nowadays, because it's socially acceptable. Men are starting to realise that the complexity and splendour of the female species is a cube and not just a square. Men are matching that and stepping up to the plate.
Improving relationships comes with hard work, a lot of fucking hard work. To be able to understand your partner requires you to confront your own emotions and deal with your own shit. To be able to understand, you need to have those moments of self-reflection. Why did that interaction happen? how can you improve the next interaction? what went wrong and how can you fix it? I strongly believe in being selfless but to be selfless, sometimes you need to be a little selfish first and work on yourself and then you can work on improving your relationships with others.
Written by Anup Sohanta (NOOPFACE)
About NOOPFACE + WHERE TO FOLLOW ALONG
Anup Sohanta is a master of words and poetry about love, loss and the universe. His words are a beautifully crafted elixir for the mind and soul that he’s released to the world on various platforms via the pen name @noopface. He gained popularity on social media, especially Instagram and has been sharing himself with his followers and fans ever since.
Working as a writer and author for years noopface discusses the universal energy that surrounds all of us. He’s an old romantic with a modern twist that discusses the relationship between males and females and the age of the “modern man” that has stepped up to treating women with the love and respect they deserve. To treat their female counterparts as equals.
In 2017 noopface released his first book, "From the Universe's Lips to My Ears" a compilation of his quotes and poetry in a book that speaks to hearts and expands minds. Noopface's goal was to spread love, light and laughter and bringing minds together in unification.
Follow him on Instagram: @noopface